Salmon Lasagne

I believe we all have the most eccentric craving deep inside us that makes us do crazy things to get them. I am talking about food.
The moment we jump out of bed and after sterilizing ourselves, food is within our focus....for me it MUST BE is a nice hot cup of tea to start a bright new day.
For unknown reasons, I can’t eat breakfast, weird, I know, I’ve been criticized for it, from all quarters, so much so, that there is this system inside me that goes into “frozen” mode, whenever someone says ‘what do you want to eat” when I am sipping my booster brew in a relaxed manner.
I developed Italian taste buds some years ago when a couple took me to an Italian restaurant for a birthday treat. Those taste buds turned into ‘out of the blue cravings’ that sometimes grip me & force me into action mode. You know what I just discovered, that one cannot grapple with a grip.
Please excuse my bad manners........that is if you notice a chunk missing from the photo. It was already inside my tummy when I thought about my blog. The name of the dish is Salmon Lasagne. It didn’t meet my expectations, later I found out that the Italian chef wasn’t around so a local substitute dished it up – that explains a lot, next visit I’m going to call & double check on the chef.........no Italian chef.......no go!

My Father's signature

I did not go to church today. I do not feel guilty about it. There is something very ‘special’ in spending time alone with God who is my Heavenly Father, on a Sunday. It is too awesome for words!

God You are amazing. You have taken care of all my needs. I lack nothing at the moment, You have not deprived me of anything, neither have You starved me since the day I have decided to live alone. That why I say You are phenomenal, incredibly & influential.

Your ubiquitous Presence truly comforts me in my time of loneness. Even though it pains me sometimes – I am consoled from memory of Your word & biblical characters. You refresh my memory & soothe my emotions. I have no qualms of Your predominance. The past & present phenomenon’s displays the singularity of Your signature in my life.

Your indulgent to my shortcoming never fail to inspire me to do better in the future. Thank you for Your amazing perceptive.

Heat Wave

The dreadful heat wave is messing up my fine-tuned schedules that I’ve laid down in my planner. In fact it is affecting my ‘working cum home-life’, in a way that is beyond my control.
I get a splitting headache if I exert a bit of brain power, then for reasons unknown I get triggered off by high dose of irritations, as my work involves speaking to people, this unexpected and outrageous surge is too dangerous for words.
I drip like an ice-cream to every simple chore that I do around the house, looking as if I was bailed out of some labour camp, not to mention the stinky aroma that whiff around my nose.........then there is this astonishing surge to lie on my blessed bed with the doors shut & air-con on and play “sleeping princess” without a care in this planet, that over-heating, due to man’s covetousness. Yap I get these surges when I’m in the midst of doing something, which cannot be postponed. A chronic urge indeed.
Life has to move on, as the saying goes, so I’ll move on, at a slower speed

Community service

The chronic weather for the past few weeks have kept me indoor. Now we are going to experience the ‘heat wave’ and I hope I don’t wrinkle up, like a dry leaf. This annoying phenomena is most exasperating because we cannot control it, like I do to the fan in my living room. I don’t think I am going to enjoy “the heat wave”. Another spectacle and alarming news to top up the heat wave is the swine flu. It looms formidable!
I am going gallivanting despite the redoubtable & passable swine flu and heat wave. Why? Well I can’t stay indoors for long as I get fidgety. My buddies are going to roll up their eye balls up & say “why la you…….” & I’ll pretend to be twitchy about it, besides I love gallivanting……..
Community service, the kids in the picture are at my place for English lessons. I guess you call it community service. These kids are very very excited about me being their English teacher – who wouldn’t be, I am a rare looking specimen – not the normal two legged ones that are rendering the same service in another block. I enjoy teaching these kids as I love kids, babies, (not when they howl) dogs & cats as long as they are cute & clean.
The kids in my block are truly amazing. Luxury is word that they may dream about, but one advantage they possess, surviving against the odds. Poverty can either develop or destroy a life. Given the right opportunity these kids will have a better lifestyle then the unfortunate and privileged ones. Rich kids take everything for granted and parents are forever pampering them (I am not saying all parents do that.) but I cannot help noticing that the contrast is vast between the kids in my church and the kids in my block, I can never blend them together and that is for sure.
The government on the other hand seem to have a low concept for the poor – just take a look at their Education system – there is no evidence of visible improvement in their system.

Down down down

Venture capital is down.
Consumer confidence is down.
Employment is down.
Auto industry is down.
Commercial real estate is down.
Foreign markets are down.
Down down down
Is anything going UP?
Some things are.
The opportunity to serve people in need is going up.
The opportunity to trust God when trusting isn't easy is going up.
The opportunity to build a faith that will last when the storms of life hit it is going up.
The opportunity to help our churches become communities where people actually get real with each other and love and support each other is going up. Don’t you agree? Certain truths remain unchanged, we know this for sure............like - God remains sovereign, The blood of Jesus is still more powerful than the stain of sin. Love still beats bigotry. Prayers still get answered. The Kingdom is still alive and well, and does not need to be bailed out by a stimulus package, isn’t that amazing? I am speechless when I think of it. The Bible is still the word of God.
Psychologist are interesting people, they write interesting stuff – they keep your brain ticking so that it doesn’t get rusty or dusty. So different from theologians, you know, some of them are so so drab!
Sometimes psychologist writers will ask their reader to do a hypothetical exercise, I enjoy doing it. I call it “intellectual thinking”. Have you heard of ‘helicopter people?’ conscious or unconsciously we want to take off fast like the helicopter, don’t know what the latest model the Russians have built, but Malaysian Air Forces are still using some outdated models that keep crashing somewhere.
This verse says we shouldn’t behave like ‘helicopter people?’ not my favourite verse either......... "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything" (James 1:1-2).
Sometimes I can get caught up in the challenges of life, face financial needs that are always shifting. Leadership requirements keep going up. Emails can be happy; but sometimes cranky people write them. And send them to me. My own motives get messed up. I get anxious, and then feel guilty. My disability doesn’t make things better for me. My emotional tolerance clash with my intellectual cognisant , the list is endless, then Paul says "For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all" (2 Cor. 4:17). His adjectives are particularly striking, since he likely wrote these words in chains, under oppression, awaiting execution. There wasn’t a helicopter waiting for him, you know.
Is it possible that in some way people actually need adversity, setbacks, maybe even something like trauma to reach the fullest level of development and growth?

When God has chosen ............

When God has chosen you to be HIS. You can be 100% sure that miracles are bound to be part of your lifestyle.
To those of you who aren’t christians, please bear with me as I share one of the many miracles in here and now..........I have to.......oh by the way, miracles aren’t meant to be comprehended, there isn’t any scientific method or inferences and definitely no theories. I feel that the christians of today’s world stress too much on hypothesis, neuroscience and epistemic relativism. No, I’m not saying that is bad, in fact we shouldn’t deprave our brains with such knowledge. In fact I was very very interested in such stuff and other unlisted stuffs as well. Still am.
Ok lets get on with the anecdote. I have now become very ‘set’ in my ways, that means I don’t like unexpected incidents or announcements at unexpected time. My blood will start to curdle. So when my weekly cleaner unsophisticatedly announced her resignation through sms, I was in a very unsophisticated aura. It took quite a while to calm down. Unbridle agitation will develop into some kind of epilepsy – no need to ask a doctor, I know that (all the reading taught me so)for sure. On the other hand friends will comment “ see, I told you so........your crazy idea of staying alone.........blab blab........ will probably give me an incurable epilepsy!!
My snug nest will be an inhabitance of all the creepiest crawlies (which I hate) if I don’t get a replacement quickly. Creepiest crawlies will give me a heartattack, due to sleepless nights. I am sure my Heavenly Father wouldn’t want me to depart from this planet in such a dishonourable manner. He doesn’t, we had a chat and lo........a replacement arrived at my doorstep today.
Unspeakable miracle. God Be Praised!!!
Going to bed now.

1:27:09 am night is still young

1:27:09 AM Night is still young………for me.

“15 candidates for Bukit Selambau by-election”

Oh wow, the political bug has bitten me. Trying to figure why on earth would a candidate pay RM8,000 deposit and not mean business about it. This is a poignant and fraudulent affair. The sudden increase of independents candidates, sure smells fishy to me. They sound like counterfeit.
Our country is in a very pathetic situation – where politics is concern. Many Malaysian are very very apologetic about it, ask them, and this is a reply you will hear; “what to do lah” and all “lahs” will come out.
Metamorphosis is a favourite topic but never really flaunt by our ministers.
I believe changes will take shape, but it is going to take a long long time, corruption and ethical values cannot overlap each other. It will be good to see how the people handle this small election - are they any wiser?

MATTA FAIR 2009

Friday the 13th. I jotted down “MATTA FAIR” in my diary. Friday the 13th. Woke up to a wet morning – in fact I had difficulty in getting my body to cooperate with the activities of the day as it still wanted to be in bed!! No, it isn’t an excuse – believe me.
So why was I going to MATTA fair, I wasn’t looking for a cheap, freaky and rush rush holiday. Not my style. There are some things that needed to be experienced & I felt that this is one of them. Well, as I expected, the MATTA fair didn’t have any packages for the disable community. I found that quite heart-breaking, I was tempted to feel cynical about it, but I didn’t. Like they say there is a story in both side of a coin.
Overall, I enjoyed the day. By mid noon it was crowded, I had difficulty moving around with my motorized wheelchair, a thought hit me at that moment, “hey, aren’t we facing economy downturn?” these guys are here, itching to spend $$$. That was something.

28 days of February

28 days of February have flown by. By now I should be used to this ideology-time doesn’t stop for anyone. Time doesn’t care two hoots for you, It just moves on and on ....
I attended a few functions in February and one of them was an exhibition by Victor Chin, it was my second brush with Victor, within a few weeks. Let me inform you that I am not an ‘aficionado’ when it comes to art or anything in that line. It was the title of the exhibition that took me there and I needed to know and feel what a exhibitions is all about, in a personal way. I was scanning the online newspapers when the word “disability” stuck out sharply, the next word was exhibition. I shut my eyes and virtualized the scenes – the American panorama drifted into my mind. I confess I’m a bit nave when it comes to exhibitions.
To start with I arrived very very VERY early at the venue…...before the organizers….don’t how that happen really….no traffic jams I think. Fell in love with park on first sight. I was solemnly warned by the van driver not to saunter around and get lost before he arrives to pick me up. Some people don’t know how to appreciate nature or parks – so sad!
Meeting Ameer and See Num for the first time at KLpac was a rare experience. That particular day was a very hot one, but these two adorable gentlemen were my guide at the park – it was a ‘sweaty’ tour for us!
I was scanning the online newspapers when the word “disability” stuck out sharply, the next word was exhibition. I shut my eyes and virtualized the scenes – the American panorama drifted into my mind. I confess I’m a bit nave when it comes to exhibitions.
I believe we all had a very relaxed time. Personally I found it very serene and smooth spacing, we weren’t rushed off here or there, like a bunch of sheep’s, everything was like ‘slow & steady’ type of atmosphere – I liked that very much.
Thank you Victor – if you are reading this. The world needs people like you, a shame that aren’t that many around.
http://victorchin.com/